Well this month I have had two appointments, one with my lovely dietitian Aimee and one with Mr Wong.  My appointment with Aimee was last week and was made to discuss my pre-op diet and the pureed post-op diet so I am all ready and prepared whenever I get my date for the operation.  As with most appointments I was weighed and was really disappointed to find that I had gained three pounds since September, I personally blame it on Christmas and my lack of motivation recently!  I was told not to worry about the small weight gain but I do need to rein it in so that my operation can go as smoothly as possible.  My pre-op diet will last for two weeks and the main purpose of it is to reduce the size of my liver which will make the surgery more likely to be able to be performed laparoscopically.  When you discuss your pre-op diet you have three choices to choose between:

• The 1000 calorie diet
• Slim-fast diet
• Milk diet

I have chosen to do the milk diet mainly because it's straightforward to follow.  The 1000 calorie diet is extremely strict and you can run into calorie trouble if every ounce of food isn't weighed correctly and I don't want to fork out for slim fast tins.  On the milk diet I will need to drink three pints of milk a day, the dietitian advised me to split the milk allowance into six meals, and I am also allowed two fat free yoghurts.  I will need to take a Bassetts chewable multi-vitamin and drink plenty of water.  I am completely aware of how difficult these two weeks are going to be but I understand how imperative it is to the success of the laparoscopic surgery.  It's just one of the hurdles I will have to jump in order to get healthy.

Yesterday I had my appointment with Mr. Wong.  It was at 4.05 and as usual I was painfully early so had to spend quite a bit of time nursing a cappuccino in Costa and mulling over the questions that I was going to ask Mr. Wong.  The waiting room on corridor B was absolutely packed and it was obvious that my appointment was going to be late but I'm quite content with people watching.  I saw a large woman join the mass of people waiting and we exchanged a knowing glance at each other, I wonder what stage she is at or if I will ever come across her again.  I was weighed by a nurse and was pleasantly surprised to find that I had lost 5.5 lbs!  More waiting ensued and an hour after my appointment slot I was ushered into a room to wait for Mr. Wong.  I sat on the examination bed, swinging my legs off the edge, and waited for him to arrive.  Mr. Wong is simply one of those rare people who put you at ease with just a smile, a genuine warm person who takes pleasure in his job.  He gave me a firm handshake and we settled down to a casual discussion about which surgery I wanted.  He filled in a consent form with all the risks of the gastric bypass surgery and we both signed it, I will sign another on the day of the surgery but Mr. Wong likes people to know what's on the consent form before the day.  We discussed my concerns about blood clots and he reassured me that they would do everything possible to prevent them and as long as I follow their advice to the letter I should be alright.

Mr. Wong then examined my tummy and showed me where the incisions would be.  He was very positive that I should be able to have my surgery laparoscopically but you never know for certain until you look inside.  After this he said he would list me and that I would see him on the day of my surgery, and off he went!  That's it, I'm finally on my way!  Eighteen weeks maximum!  A nurse came in and swabbed my nose, throat and underarms for MRSA and then I was allowed to go home.

I know that I am deeply, deeply excited for the future and what this operation will bring to my life.  The changes that it will make will be unimaginable, I almost can't even visualise what it will be like.  The fear of the surgery is starting to gnaw at me though and last night I found my mind constantly wandering to the day of the surgery and how frightened I am going to be.  I kept seeing myself crying on the operating table, scared I will never see my family again and even, stupidly, telling the doctors to guide them to a good bereavement councillor if something goes wrong!  I know it's normal to be afraid and I guess I know the closer to the time it gets, the more frightened I will be.  For these next eighteen weeks, or however long it ends up being, I need to focus on getting my strength and fitness up and my weight down, if only a little bit.  I want to be in the best shape possible for this surgery, I want to make sure that I have the best chance possible.